In one of my Get Gritty Facebook Groups, we have been discussing grit, and the first two parts of grit, passion and purpose.
We've defined grit as passion and perseverance for long-term goals.
We've reconnected with our passion for horses-what made you fall in love with them in the first place.
We've also uncovered our personal purpose for our horsemanship journeys.
Now I feel is a good time to step back and consider this question:
Is it possible to be too gritty?
Yes, it is.
There is a dark side to grit. We can get so focused and be so driven on our goals that we can start to believe that we can only be happy if we achieve them. So we get caught into the happiness trap, that is the "I will be happy when I can do .... with my horse," or "I will be happy when my horse and I win ......"
Here is where I caution you to not connect your happiness to your achievements. And I get it, this can be tough, especially along our horsemanship journeys! We all want to be able to do amazing things with our horses, and indeed, it wouldn't be very motivating to go out and put in the hours of effort and work required to develop a relationship with our horse if we wouldn't be able to achieve some of those goals!
And I've also studied the science of goal setting and hope, and I understand how we are naturally goal-driven beings. It is natural for our happiness to be connected to our goals.
That is where getting really clear on our passion and purpose, and making sure that our horsemanship journey and our actions align with our core values-that we are becoming the best horsewoman that we can be.
And remember that the true test of whether or not you are a good horsewoman is simple:
Does your horse trust you?
Not a ribbon. Not being able to perform a flying lead change.
Having a positive relationship with your horse. Isn't that what we all want?
So don't get so focused on your goals that you get too gritty.
A great quote from Winston Churchill sums it up pretty well:
"Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never— in nothing, great or small, large or petty—never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense."
Keep true to your values, your personal purpose, your honor, and I take good sense to also mean horse sense. You can get gritty, be happy, and enjoy your horsemanship journey all at the same time!
What do you think-is it possible to be too gritty? Share you thoughts in the comments!